While all this was occurring, I was getting older, took less time for myself and gained about 50 pounds. I truly honestly hate writing that number down to look at it. After having Noah, I realized it was time to get myself back. I wanted to feel comfortable wearing clothes, going out in public. I wanted to be able to keep up with my boys and have more energy. But most of all I wanted to be healthier and be a better role model for my boys (all three of them!). I somehow along the way stopped taking time for myself. I started putting all my energy into taking care of a husband, children, a dog, and a household, that taking care of myself just became lower and lower on my priority list. I had to do some soul searching and I came to the conclusion, I do not know who I am anymore. With all the changes that have occurred, I lost myself. So, I am actively on my quest to find "me" again. I hope to turn up a new and improved Jenn, wife, mother, daughter, friend, and sister.
I joined my gym and got myself a personal trainer. He is fantastic. He has the right level of pushing and praise down. Exactly what I need. While, I know the journey to a smaller Jenn will take quite some time, I am very proud of myself for just taking the first step. I hope to look in the mirror during my journey and be excited at the woman looking back.
I have already discovered that I love having "me" time. I do love to put the kids in the gym childcare and tune out and workout hard! I am rekindling my romance with baking/cooking, though with much healthier items on our menu. I am actively involved in a Bible study that challenges my thinking and I am looking for other hobbies and interests to build myself back up!
It all came down to me realizing that I am "worth it". The God of this universe and the creator of me did not create me to live a life of negativity and dullness. He created me to be joyful in His creation of myself and everything around me. He created me to live life abundantly!
So, now begins the hard work...going to the gym five days a week and a 1600-1800 calorie diet.
